Red Flags Boundary Violations
You have been spending time with others and something just does not feel right. When you voice your concerns, it feels as if you are making a big deal out of nothing, that it’s all in your head, or you need to just get over it. You feel guilty and ashamed that these feelings are even there. Why can’t you be just like a normal person and move on?
What you are experience is a boundary violation. Someone is not respecting your space (emotional, physical, mental).
Here are some signs that someone is violating your boundaries:
Dismissing your feelings
Blaming you for their mistakes
You feel resentful after spending time with them
They use your feelings against you
It can feel like you are being a crappy friend when you find yourself being resentful, bitter, and wanting to avoid others. Like, if you really cared, wouldn’t want to be with them all the time?
Fact is: sometimes the people in your life aren’t always supportive, can be emotionally draining, and gaslight you which leaves you feeling depleted and just not good.
Honor your feelings and acknowledge that there are needs that aren’t being met and that there is energy going out and not enough for you to recharge.
If you’re able to, what can you do to protect your energy? Can you talk to your person? Do you cut them out? Do you find someone who can help support you while they are being assholes (you know, like when you don’t have any other option but to be around them)?